Posted in crossroads, death, Developmental disability, disability rights, family, history, Self-advocacy, Temporal Lobe Epilepsy

Crossroads #05 (Self-Advocacy Sunday)

A walkway leads out into a desert within pink sand, with a sign with arrows pointing both directions sideways. Letters matching the pink sand read "Crossroads."
Crossroads in the California desert.

Dear Cheryl,

Your bone resonance exists unseen
By those who can only
Read the words
On gravestones
Without feeling
The bones underneath

The grave of my dad’s aunt Voicy — he was close to her, she was more like a sister in age (my dad was 1941-2014). May they both rest in peace, and her husband as well. The gravestone is in Rose Bud, White County, Arkansas.
My great-aunt Voicy.
(I think. I’m faceblind and
some memorial websites get her and her
mom confused. I honored both of them
in my name change.)

They would have it
That you were a crip
And only a crip
You almost believed them
And were probably afraid
To say what you may have suspected

But your bones know better
And so do I

Spoken from the bone,
Mel

Posted in crossroads, Developmental disability, disability rights, letters, Self-advocacy

Crossroads #04 (Self-Advocacy Sunday)

A walkway leads out into a desert within pink sand, with a sign with arrows pointing both directions sideways. Letters matching the pink sand read "Crossroads."
Crossroads in the California desert.
Yellow hill with oak trees in Henry Coe State Park.
Image courtesy Wild Recovery.

Dear Cheryl,

I heard you speaking
The language of Ideas
But I felt your bones stirring
In the language of Resonant Bones
You called yourself an ally
But if you speak Resonant Bone
Only an Idea
Could convince you
You’re not one of us
(Because you are)
And that is why
I’ve written you the invitation
And not someone else
I’ll explain more later
I promise

Spoken from the bone,
Mel

Madrone trees near a trail in Henry Coe State Park.
Image courtesy Wild Recovery.

Posted in crossroads, Developmental disability, disability rights, family, from the bone, Okies, Self-advocacy

Crossroads #03 (Self-Advocacy Sunday)

A walkway leads out into a desert within pink sand, with a sign with arrows pointing both directions sideways. Letters matching the pink sand read "Crossroads."
Crossroads in the California desert.
A small area of forest in California's Siskiyou Mountain range near the Oregon border. This being the cemetery where my father was buried according to his wishes -- in just a pine box and shroud with no funeral ceremony.
Small California mountain forest cemetery that contains my father’s bones.

Dear Cheryl,

The bones of my Okie ancestors
Lie in the cemeteries
Of Wasco
Of Shafter
Of many towns
Throughout Tulare and Kern Counties
The rest of the San Joaquin Valley
Stretching back
To Oklahoma and Arkansas

A collection of Baggs gravestones from mostly San Joaquin Valley, California cemeteries.
A collection of Baggs gravestones from mostly San Joaquin Valley, California cemeteries. One (upper right) is my dad’s in the Siskiyous.

The bones of my Okie ancestors
Dance to a country beat
And my living bones
Dance in resonance
Without trying

Most people understand this
At least in part
Most people
Most people understand
The ties of blood
This kind of ancestry

Dry grass hills and trees outside Bakersfield, California. I feel these hills in my bones and there are bones in hills like these.

Even if they can’t feel their bones
Shaking the yellow-grass California hills
Bothering the roots of the lone oak trees
Living endlessly forgotten
Under converted deserts
And redwood forests
Manzanita and madrone
Mudslide and earthquake and fire

These are the bones in my life
You are most likely to understand
So they are the first I will hand you
Please think hard about them
But don’t forget
To listen in your own bones
For the song

The other song.

Spoken from the bone,
Mel

Posted in crossroads, Developmental disability, Developmental disability service system, disability rights, from the bone, Self-advocacy

Crossroads #01 (Self-Advocacy Sunday)

A walkway leads out into a desert within pink sand, with a sign with arrows pointing both directions sideways. Letters matching the pink sand read "Crossroads."
Crossroads in the California desert.

Dear Cheryl,

There is a lonely crossroad
Somewhere between here and nowhere

Where the crows wheel in circles
And call to each other
In their hidden language
But never talk to us
And never land

Where the light is always twilight
Though it range from purple to blue
And sometimes a murky greyish tan

Where a paved road with wheelchair access
Meets a dirt footpath without
Where the Country of Ideas
Borders the Country of Resonant Bones

And it is that borderland
And that crossroads
Where we must meet
We must both translate
We must both learn to listen in a foreign tongue

And as speaking to the dead
Is no problem
In this land outside of time
I have no fear
That you will stand me up
For this strange date

You’ll be too curious
You’ll begin to feel
A strange resonant song
In that part of your bones
Where your body anchors your soul
And you won’t be able to help dancing
To the tune
That already haunts your twilight dreams

So come to the crossroads of Bones and Ideas
You’ll find me there
Awaiting you
As long as it takes

Spoken from the bone,
Mel